A picture by Ben
Me + The Internet 2010
A productive afternoon thanks to @FallingBullets.
AWESOME !!! :D just how I feel…
Me + The Internet 2010
A productive afternoon thanks to @FallingBullets.
AWESOME !!! :D just how I feel…
So, went to my old YO’s end of year concert a while back. Before hand me and my dad went and got a drink. He actually went into a pub and asked for a cup of tea… I know, crazy aint he :D. Then after we left (twas quite loud in the Brewery’s garden, a dance festival or something, far too many weirdly clad school girls running round like they have just been fed a large number of blue smarties. So, yeah. After that we went and read out books (me; Pandora’s Star by Peter F. Hamilton and my dad; the new Anthony Bevor book) on a bench. Whilst I was reading, a couple of old orchestra buddies appear, taking a casual stroll, so I went and chatted to them for a while. Then they left to get changed, so I read again, hehe. Anyway, TO THE CONCERT!!!.
First half wasnt that good: Canzon XVII by Gabrielli was pretty good but had a really clichéd ending. The Arvo Part piece was a tad thin, though that might have been the effect. The Anton Webern pieces just sounded like he was trying to hard, though I probably wasnt listening well enough. It seems the orchestra liked it though, so I guess it grows on you. And the final piece of the first half: Variants on a Shaker Melody, was far too long, playing that melody into the ground, theres some far better bits of Appalachian Springs too :(.
Then the break came, and I was sat on my own through most of it (my dad was a steward so was doing shiz). I found my old buddies just as the second half was about to start, so :(. BUT I did meet up with a dude-trumpeter by the name of Simon. He was quite a dude, until a certain miss A, who I was devoted to, fell out with him. So now, even though they have mended their bridges, I still feel negative towards him :(. But I digress, we grouped together and sat near the front, had some quick lols and then the second half started rolling.
And my, how it rolled. Started with a brassy piece by Purcell (as its his birth anniversary) which was enjoyable. Then, THEN!, it started rolling a-proper. Matt Bell (one of the dudes I met up with before the concert), the lead cellist, had composed a piece for the orchestra and it was AWESOME!!!! Oh it were perfection :). Superb. Then came some crazy Aufbruch by Detlev Glanert, which was a bit odd, but still rather good. And they finished off with the Invernal Dnase, Berceuse and Finale from Stravinsky’s Firebird. What an awesome second half that was.
Then came the afterparty. No, I am serious…they had an afterparty, and it was moderately fun. I caught up with a bunch of awesome musicians who I am proud to call my friend. Alas, it came to an end, my bro wanted to escape (being an antisocial teenage git) and my dad probably wanted to go home. As it happened, miss A was also leaving at the same time (coincidence ;) w00t). So, she and I both waved good bye, and she hugged everyone. I spontaneously picky-uppy-spinny-roundy hugged her, and it was successful, apart from the exit, which would have been ever so slightly more awesome if I had sunk to one knee and produced a bouquet of flowers. Cause I am like that :D.
Man, it was a wonderful evening :D
Is there something wrong with believing your friends are amazing, fantastic, awesome, the best. Believing they are god-like? Idolising them?
If so… I hope my friends can come to forgive me for being a little overbearing because I truly believe they are the greatest people ever.
It seems so, though. As it only causes stress and complications. Especially with the opposite sex.
So, my advice to you, the internet, is to get to know me, but not to become my friend. Cause nobody wants that, do they.
I don’t think anyone knows me. But that’s not a new thought, which this post is supposed to quantify. Unfortunately many of my thoughts have been forgotten between getting out of bed and getting to the pc (via breakfast/shower).
All I really want for people (specially my friends) is happiness. I also want to (sometimes) force freedom upon people, but I have never been able to purvey those wishes in a manner in which they actually believe I am being serious (I guess).
I had some thoughts I might email to a friend, but I don’t know whether I should. All I want is to be honest, but maybe honesty inst beneficial enough for the strain it may put upon them and/or the friendship. Maybe I am just being paranoid (which I think may be a serious problem I have).
My friend-set is rather limited, having:
I have the small () and this list and then most of this community) who fill up about 15 of my MSN contacts.
Anyway, I dont know why I went on about that.
I just realised that I wont be able to go and spend an awesome time with some awesome friends, to go on the first expedition I have ever been invited to and wanted to go on because I have a job that I dont really care about. I have the job to earn money I dont want so I can pay off a loan I dont mind having. I miss all the fun in the world in the name of money.
Money: Destroying fun since its creation.
So I started this day off thinking about blogging about my fathers ‘maturing’ mental state. He is seriously starting to cause suspicions towards me, and that’s especially worrying as he is a psychiatric nurse. Ahh well. That was at the Fish Steps, waiting to be picked up.
After getting in it started to rain, quite heavily, and then hail, and then rain some more. So we decided to forgo the price difference and park in a multistory. And heres where it began. Our driver, the awesome Corkers, doesnt know how to bay park, being newly passed. She kinda knocked her wing-mirror off 0.o, but luckily it just popped back on. By the time we escaped the carpark it had stopped raining, so we wondered round town for a few hours. Went to Juicafe for a quick shake, and a few games of Othello, Jenga, and Connect4. Then we set off home, scraping her car on the way out (damn bollards).
This is where it gets interesting, she was quite tetchy (understandable, after hurting her precious car) and the two in the back (I was in the front) were being quite childish, throwing things round and being a tad hyper, not that surprising after eating eee numbers..but hey. Corkers got angry, at them/us and at a few drivers that were quite annoying. She then tried to overtake a caravan wanting to get in the lane we were in…quite an experience :D
Ahh the joys of life.
Yeah, I had an idol. His name was James, and he was the coolest geek in school. He had supremely orange hair, and was a geek through and through. He took Maths, Electronics, and Physics for ALevel (with an AS in Computing). He liked gaming, was one of the people that told me about CSS and the like, he came to a few of the LAN parties that I went to. And life was good.
But here’s the downfall. He had a girlfriend. She was my friend (well I had her on msn…) and we got on. Of course, I never wanted to date her or anything so destructive. Nope, all I wanted was a friend, that’s all I ever want. But my stupid piece-of-shit emotions or whatever decided that, no, I would big her up into an awesome beauty. Maybe that it was that she was forever out of reach, or exam ‘nerves’ or my incessant complements and her constant depreciation of herself, I have no idea. But I know that she is totally, like, so hawt its unbelievable. She wore a skirt and my fly button nearly popped off. I kept telling myself ‘I DONT WANT THIS SHIT!’ but myself doesnt listen to logic/reason.
So, I kind of idolised her too. She is rather smart, outstripping me (not too hard) by a long shot. She wants to become some crazy-ass doctor type (following in similar footsteps to her dad). For some stupid reason, she got rejected from many a university. To be brutally honest, those universities were utter fools. She was waiting on her last application, which was being treated by the university litteraly slower than a snail. And thus with her dilemma, talking about how my university had accepted me on all counts, and bragging about my few Scholarship offers was a totally foolishly foolish thing to do. No, more than foolish: COMPLETELY AND UTTERLY RETARDED!!!! But I did do, and there lies point 1 on friendships lost. She started crying. I am totally completely ashamed by what I did that night. I rank it as one of the worst evenings of my life. Ranked with the time I made my aunty cry, my mother cry and told my mother that it was all her fault…..but I digress. To the next point of epic fail. (yes, there is more).
In the same conversation, I had continually congratulated her awesome beauty, as I usually do with my female friends. I don’t see the point in being secretive with my feelings, it just makes me feel more perverted than I already do. So yeah, I was making a point of how absolutely mind-blowing she looked. I took it one step too far. I think I was walking a thin line, telling people my feelings. But at that moment, I jumped off the frying pan, and into the flaming bare pit. Yes…I told her I loved her…completely stupid. Another fantastically dumb-arsed thing to do. I didnt expect anything of it, just confessing some (confused) feelings. But oh no, not only had I caused her to cry that night, I also told her I loved her. Oh but there’s more. Her boyfriend, James, yes James my Idol, was online, or reached by text. Yep, he threatened me with a beating. Which I totally agree with him about, I would have gone and asked him to beat me up if it didnt feel like I was just trying to escape the shame (and I wasnt a wuss).
And the third and final mistake of that evening was to argue with her. Yep, I argued too. See, probably due to her self-depreciating nature, she said sorry far far too much. So I started pointing it out and saying that she needent be, and stuff.. She said sorry that night, I pointed it out, once too many times.
Indeed. I have a Java exam tomorrow. Hopefully wont be too taxing, but its at 9 am, tooo early zzz :D
Me and my friends had a nice weekend, we all went to the cinema and watched Night@Museum2.0. I have to say, Amelia Earhart was quite attractive… LOL. Then we got some pizza, ate it in Arcath’s garden, went to the pub for a few rounds of pool, a game of dominoes and some card games too. When we got back to Arcath’s we watched Black Sheep, a humorously silly film about a super sheep gone bad, and then we started watching The Greatest Game Ever Played from about half way through. It was a nice film about a up-and-coming golf player, or something, winning the American Open and beating the ‘greatest English player of all time’.
I also moved back to windows (BOOOOOO) cause I felt like installing SimCity 4 (SC4D, and maybe Supreme Commander. I installed putty and got to work on something or another. But it just wasnt that great, one term per program isnt enough. So I went and got Ubuntu for Windows (BOOOOO). I dont really like Ubuntu, but as it was relatively easy to install, I thought I might as well take a crack at it. Another annoying thing about windows, is that the stock sound drivers that came with my mobo periodically break svchost. Every time. No exceptions. I hope the ones from the internet that I just downloaded work without crashing.
I am in the process of re-organizing my web server, so that it looks nicer “behind-the-scenes”, and works nicer too.
EDIT: Update, I have sound working :D, and that Ubuntu for Windows (BOOOO) sucks ass, not even a virtual machine-like jive…
